Heart Attack

Jay: Let me go first, Bey.  
Bey: No Jay-

Jay: That unknown person that called was Chrissy.

Bey: Excuse me? Repeat that.

Jay: It was Chrissy. She's been calling me for a few weeks now-

Bey: For WHAT? 

Jay: Lower your voice. Don't wake him up. 

Bey: I don't give a shit! She's been calling you and you didn't tell me! You been talking to her all this time!!! 

Jay: Bey, stop shouting before you wake up Jayden. I know you're upset but if you wake him up thats yo ass! 

Bey: *yells* How the hell can I be-

Jay: *snatches her up* *yells* Aye! The fuck did I just say?

Jayden: *cries*

Bey: See! YOU woke him up! *picks him up* *rocks him* Shhhhhhhh ! Its okay baby. Mommy got you. Go back to sleep. *rubs his back* 

Jay: Beyonce, lay him back down. He's fine. 

Bey: Leave me alone. He's not fine if he's crying. Now why were you talking to Chrissy?

Jay: Bey-

Bey: Shawn, I don't have time for you to sugar coat anything. I want to know the truth! 

Jay: Alright....I bailed her out of jail. 

Bey: Tell me this is a joke.

Jay: Its not-

Bey: Wait wait wait. Let me get this straight. You bailed Chrissy out. The girl you cheated on me with, the girl who caused drama in our lives, the girl who said you raped-

Jay: Yes her. Babe, listen-

Bey: Don't babe me Shawn! This is bullshit! Why would you bail her stupid ass out. She-

Jay: Look-

Bey: This girl has disrespected me on numerous accounts, Shawn! Do you know how stupid I look right now?

Jay: How do you look stupid?

Bey: What do you mean how? Shawn, you bailed out Chrissy. She deserves to stay in jail. Why?

Jay: Because she apologized and it seemed sincere. She said she's a changed person!

Bey: Shawn, you are so stupid! And you call me naive! You believe her??

Jay: Yes I believe her. I feel bad- 

Bey: Feel bad for WHAT? SHE should feel bad. I feel so damn  disrespected! AGAIN!

Jay: *touches her thigh* Baby listen-

Bey: *smacks his hand* DONT TOUCH ME! 

Jayden: *jumps and cries* Hmmmm!

Jay: See now you're waking him up! Go lie him down!

Bey: Don't tell me what to do! Go call Chrissy! *walks towards room*

Jay: *grabs her arm* Babe. Wait.

Bey: *snatches away* What do you want, Shawn?

Jay: You still love me?

Bey: *rolls eyes* The nerve! *walks away* 

Jay: *follows her* Babe, can you listen to me please?

Bey: I already did that. Go away! 

Jay: I wasn't finished.

Bey: *walks in room* *lays down* I don't care you hear the rest. Get out!

Jay: You can't just ignore me, Beyonce. 

Bey: I can and I WILL! Can you get out already!? I don't wanna look at your funny looking face.  

Jay: Beyonce?

Bey: *looks at him* *silent*

Jay: Babe, I love you.

Bey: *rolls eyes*

Jay: You gone give me the silent treatment? 

Bey: *silent*

Jay: Ight....I get it.  I'll let you cool off.  *leaves*

(Bey)

I can't believe this. How could Shawn bail her out? I feel like shit! I couldn't help but cry. This is a big slap in the face! He basically said that he doesn't care that I fought her so many times. For him, over him, and because of him. He feels bad for her and I will never understand why. He shouldn't care about her not one bit. How long has he been talking to her? What did or do they talk about? Does she write him letters, does he respond? Does he have feelings for her? Is he sending her money? Is he cheating on me? That must be why he acted like that when he called me earlier. Talking about he'll love me no matter happens between us. Something must being really going on for him to say that. I wanna ask him a million questions. My phone vibrated. I didn't recognize the number. I just let it go to voice mail. Whoever it was didn't leave a message, so it probably wasn't that important. I watched Jayden sleep. I rubbed his face. He started to smile and giggle in his sleep. That brought a smile to my face. He must be having some awesome dream! I continued to watch him sleep. Until my stomach started to growl! I got out of the bed and changed my clothes. Some little shorts and knee high socks. I didn't want Jayden to fall of the bed so I put him in his crib. To the kitchen I shall head. I walked passed Jay who was sitting on the couch with my Ray Bans in his hand. Twirling them around. He looked mad or something. I was stared into the fridge debating on what I wanted to eat, when Shawn came in.

Jay: Beyonce?

Bey: Shawn?

Jay: Did you have fun today?

Bey: *looks at him confused* What?

Jay: Did. You. Have. Fun. Today? 

Bey: Why do you care, Chrissy-oops I meant Shawn.

Jay: What did y'all do?

Bey: Went to eat then went to Kelly's house. Why?

Jay: Thats all you guys did?

Bey: Thats what I said. Why are you asking me 50 questions? Get away!

Jay: Why are you so defensive?

Bey: Im not being defensive. Stop asking questions when I already told you what we did! 

Jay: But you're lying though!

Bey: *looks in fridge* Shawn, Im not lying. 

Jay: So what did y'all do again?

Bey: *sighs* Oh my God. I just told you! 

Jay: You sure thats what happen, Beyonce?

Bey: *closes fridge* You're annoying me. Can you get out of the way? *tries to move pass him*

Jay: *blocks her* Not until you tell me what happen!

Bey: I told you! Move! *tries to get past* 

Jay: You left out the part that you hung out with Tony!!!

Bey: Shawn, you're delusional! Move please!

Jay: So you're just gonna lie to me right in my face?

Bey: Im not-

Jay: *yells* Then why the fuck did he bring your shades that you left in his fuckin car huh Beyonce! 

Bey: *lost for words*

Jay: *grabs both of her arms and grips them*  Yo you fucked that nigga?? 

Bey: *cries* Nooo Jay!! 

Jay: *grips tighter* *yells* Then what the fuck were you doing with that nigga??? Huh??

Bey: *cries* Nothinggggg-

Jay: *yells* Then why the fuck are you crying??!!

Bey: Because you're hurting meeeeeeee!! *sniff*

Jay: *yells* Did you fuck that nigga?? Dont lie!!!

Bey: *cries* Nooooo!! I just said that. Why would I do that??

Jay: I don't know! YOU tell ME! 

Bey: Can you let me go you're hurting me!!!!

Jay: *looks at her for a minute* *lets her go* You talk about how I disrespected you. When you're disrespecting me. 

Bey: *rubs arms* Hoooooooow? 

Jay: The fuck you mean how? You were wit em!! That doesn't seem wrong to you??

Bey: I didn't plan it! He just showed up, Jay. 

Jay: Showed up where?

Bey: The restaurant!

Jay: And what happen?

Bey: What do you mean? 

Jay: What. Happen? Its simple. 

Bey: Umm-

Jay: And don't lie to me either!

Bey: We into his car and-

Jay: And WHAT?

Bey: We talked! Thats it that all!

Jay: About?

Bey: He asked me about mother-hood, my job, my family, and we talked about old memories.

Jay: Ohh memories huh?

Bey: Yes. Its not-

Jay: Like when y'all used to fuck??

Bey: No. Now you're being ridiculous!

Jay: Im being ridiculous but you're creepin wit ya ex boyfriend. How do you think I feel and look?

Bey: Shawn, Im not creepin with anyone. Nothing happen!!

Jay: And I should believe for what reason?

Bey: Because I'm telling you the truth!!!

Jay: I doubt it. 

Bey: Wait! You're jumping down my throat about Tony! But you've BEEN talking to Chrissy! "Unknown" has called you more than once!! So who's the real liar here. Me or YOU! 

Jay: *silent* 

Bey: Got nothing to say now? The truth got your tongue?

Jay: Bey-

Bey: Whats going on between you two! Huh Shawn! I want the TRUTH!

Jay: I told you that I bailed her out! 

Bey: And? What else! I know that there's more to this!

Jay: *sighs* Umm-

Bey: Umm my ass! Whats going on!? Stop beating around the bush!

Jay: Alright! Shit! Chrissy called and apologized for the drama she caused. I forgave her-

Bey: you What???

Jay: *looks down* I forgave her.

Bey: What the fuck for?

Jay: Because babe. She seemed really sincere and what not. I believed her. 

Bey: Wooooow. Continue!

Jay: And she umm asked me to help her when she's get out in a little while-

Bey: Help her do WHAT?

Jay: Well she'll be homeless when she's gets out so I helped her with a place to live-

Bey: Are you shitting me??

Jay: What do you want me to say? I feel like its the right thing to do.

Bey: The right thing to do? After all that she has put you and I through. And you think that this is the right thing to do?

Jay: Yes Beyonce.

Bey: How many times have you talked to her? 

Jay: Huh?

Bey: If you can "Huh?" then you can hear me! Now how many times!

Jay: A couple times. I didn't keep count.

Bey: Either can't keep count or you didn't. Which one?

Jay: Bey-

Bey: What do you guys talk about?

Jay: *sighs* Uhh. She asked me how I was doing, she told me to tell you that she's sorry, she asked about Jayden-

Bey: My son isn't her got damn business. Did you tell her THAT?

Jay: *silent* 

Bey: Have you given her money? 

Jay: *hesitant* Yeahhhh.

Bey: *shakes head* Wow. Just wow. Is all that I can say.

Jay: I-

Bey: *knocks the flower vase on the island on the floor* Ahhhhhh! 

Jay: Aye! I bought you those flowers! 

Bey: I DON'T GIVE A SHIT! 

Jay: Beyonce-

Bey: You go visit her?

Jay: No.

Bey: Do you have feelings for her?

Jay: No!

Bey: *rolls eyes* Yeah right.

Jay: Do YOU have feeling for Tony? 

Bey: *silent*

Jay: Girl, you better fuckin tell me that you don't.

Bey: *silent*

Jay: ANSWER ME!!

Bey: YES! ....A little.

Jay: *stares at her* 

Bey: *stares at him*

Jay: So go marry that nigga then!! 

Bey: What?? Jay-

Jay: You heard what the fuck I said! 

Bey: I don't wanna marry him!!

Jay: So why you got feelings for em then? 

Bey: ...I don't know. I just do. 

Jay: You still love him. Don't you?

Bey: No. I don't love him!

Jay: You sure about that?

Bey: Im positive. 

Jay: *stares at her* ......Like I said go marry him.

(Jay)

This past 3 days have been nothing but hell! Beyonce and I haven't stopped fighting and arguing. I've been sleeping on the coach. Well except for last night. Only because of Jayden. He wouldn't go to sleep. I put him to bed by rocking him on my chest. I tried to get up but he cried and cried. So I slept in the bed. I guess he wanted his mommy and daddy to be together. I think he knows me and his mom are on bad terms. Last night when Bey was in the shower I heard her crying. Thats all she's been doing lately.I can't lie, I cried too. We even fought over what to feed Jayden, what to dress him in. Everything. I can't believe she actually has feelings for another man. Thats hurts. She cheating on me. Emotionally. The worse form of cheating. Makes me think about what IM doing wrong. I think she's talking to him again. She's so sneaky with her phone. Turning it face down. Pass codes. We fought about that too. We fought about Chrissy. I hated that we fought in front of Jayden. It got physical sometimes. He hated to see me and Bey fight. I wasn't punching on her or nothing. More like shove and push. She would punched on me though. I just took as much as I could until I pushed her off of me. Her back hit the wall. She tried to charge me like a line backer. I bear hugged her and told to her to calm the fuck down. I love this woman beyond what words can say. I knew never love could feel like a heart attack. Throughout the fights and arguments these past couple of days. We had a conversation. Im sure if we called off the wedding, pushed it back or put it on hold. My mom called me told she'll be over here in 2 or 3 hours. She's staying for the night to talk about Jayden's party. Bey's mom was coming too. Great. Just what we need. I walked into the bedroom. Bey was laying with Jayden.

Jay: My mom will be here in 3 hours and this house is a mess.

Bey: Thats not my problem. Clean it up then!

Jay: Can you stop being an asshole for 5 minutes?

Bey: Can you stop being a dumb ass for 5 minutes?

Jay: Imma show you what a dumb ass is. Keep it up! 

Bey: Boy, ain't nobody afraid of you! Get. OUT.

Jay: Man for real! You need to clean this danm house.

Bey: I don't need to shit but stay black and die.

Jay: Maaaaan, my mom is gone have a fit about the house being dirty !

Bey: Am I suppose to care? 

Jay: You're such a...Never mind. I'll do it.

Bey: Im sure.

Jay: Where is my mom suppose to sleep?

Bey: Why are you asking me ?

Jay: Because your and Jayden's stuff are in the guess room. 

Bey: So move the stuff, Shawn. 

Jay: ITS YOUR STUFF!!

Bey: Don't yell at me!!

Jay: Shit you get on my last nerve!! Im this close to leaving!!

Bey: LEAVE THEN!! No one is asking you to stay!!

Jayden: *crawls to the edge of the bed* *reaches for Jay* 

Bey: Trader! 

Jay: *picks him up* Are you gonna help me clean or not?

Bey: Not! 

Jay: *sighs* *puts Jayden back on the bed* *leaves*

Jayden: *throws tantrum*

Bey: *picks him up* Whats wrong mommy's babyy?? 

Jayden: *cries and hollers*

Bey: Why are you crying?? 

Jayden: *points to the door* *cries*

Bey: *sad tone* You don't want mommy, Jayden?

Jayden: *cries* *points to door* Uuuuuuuhhhhhnnnn!!!

Bey: You want your daddy?

Jayden: *shakes his head yes* *licks his snot*

Bey: Eww Jayden. Don't do that. *wipes his snot with her shirt* *Walks in living room* Here! Your son wants you.

Jayden: *reaches for Jay*

Jay: I can't lil man. Daddy is cleaning.

Jayden: *cries and reaches for Jay* Hhhhhhhnnnnnn!!

Bey: You don't want mommy?

Jay: Apparently NOT!

Bey: Shawn, do me a favor and shut up. 

Jay: Girl-...Never mind. 

Jayden: *cries* *reaches for Jayden*

Bey: Can you get your son. Goodness. 

Jay: Can't you see me cleaning?

Bey: Can't you hear your son crying, because he wants you?

Jayden: *cries*

Bey: Be mad at me but don't take it out on him. 

Jay: *sighs* *takes Jayden from Bey* Are you gonna clean up then?

Bey: I suppose. 

Jay: *sits on the couch* 

Bey: *attitude* Why don't go give him a bath?
Jay: You can lose the attitude. Its not wanted.

Bey: Right. Among other things. 

Jay: *stands up* What's that suppose to mean?

Bey: Nothing. *starts cleaning the living room* 

Jay: Come on man. You want daddy to give you bath?

Jayden: *excited* *smiles* 

Jay: *walks towards the bedroom* Give daddy some love. 

Jayden: *kisses Jay* *smiles*

Jay: At least someone loves me. 

(Bey) 

Things between Jay and I are all messed up. We're both to blame. This drama came out of no where. All we do fight and argue. Lack of communication is the reason. Im stupid to have feelings for Tony. I don't even know why. He text me hours after he called me when I didn't know the number.  I told him about my feelings and that I have stop talking to him completely. I told him that him and I being friends is bad. Its coming between Jay and I. He said he understood but it hurt him because he's in love with someone else. We fought anything and everything. From Tony, Chrissy, Jayden, his mom, who does this, who does that. Whatever it was. We had a fight about it. Its so damn annoying. I just wanna move past this. I just want it to be over already. I love Jay more then anyone ever will. I feel bad for letting Tony bringing us to this point. I feel like some angry sex would be great. It could help. Our mothers are coming over tonight. No one is mood for these nosy ass parents. All they're going to do ask whats wrong with us and whats going on. Trying to solve our problems. I hate having to put on a smile like everything great, perfect and wonderful. But we have to, just like anything other time. I don't how it will turn out this time. I don't will be able to cover it up. I finished cleaning the living room and the kitchen. I was tired as hell. I was sweating a little. I walked in the bedroom. Jay had his shirt off. Nothing but his shorts. He just finished putting Jayden's pajamas on. Jay was laying on his back and Jayden was sitting on Jay's chest bouncing up and down. They were cracking up. It was too freaking cute. It made my heart warm. I couldn't help but smile and giggle. 


Jay: You find this funny? It lowkey hurts too. *chuckles* 
Bey: *giggles* You see me laughing right?
Jay: Let him jump up and down on you.
Bey: Umm no. I don't want breast cancer. 
Jay: You kind of need titties for that. Don't ya think? *chuckles* 
Bey: You like it. No complaints. *fake smile* *winks* 
Jay: *silent*
Bey: Hmmp. Just what I thought. *walks towards* 
Jay: What are you about to do?
Bey: Too taaaake a shooowwweerr. Would you like to join me?
Jay: *sits up* Hell yeah. 
Bey: SIKE. Negro PUHLEASE. *walks in the bathroom* *strips down, gets in shower and turns water on* 


*15 minutes later* 


Jay: *walks in bathroom* Bey?
Bey: How may I help you? 
Jay Girl, this ain't McDonalds. 
Bey: Lord Shawn. What is it?
Jay: I need Jayden's face towel. 
Bey: So get the damn towel.
Jay: Its in there. 
Bey: *looks around* I don't see it.
Jay: *opens curtains* 
Bey: Jay!! 
Jay: What?? Like I haven't you naked before. Be quiet.
Bey: *looks down* Ummmm.
Jay: What? *grabs face towel* 
Bey: *points*
Jay: *looks down* Great. Lemme get outta here. *tries to push his bonner down*
Bey: *laughs* 
Jay: This shit ain't funny!! You ain't even gone help a nigga out either.
Bey: Damn skippy!! *laughs* 
Jay: You dead ass wrong, Beyonce. 
Bey: Where is my child while you're in here bothering me?
Jay: In his crib. 
Bey: Ohh. 
Jay: *drops shorts and boxers* You ain't gone help me out?
Bey: *stares at the Peen* Jay can you pull your shorts up please. 
Jay: Why?
Bey: *still staring at the peen* Because I'm trying to stand my ground. THIS isn't helping. *bites bottom lip* 

Jay: Maaaan. Stop playing!!! *gets in the shower* You want this shit as bad as I do. 

Bey: Get out. You're so distracting!

(Bey) 

For the next 8 minutes Jay took out his aggression and frustration on me. Punishment wasn't the word. Lord have mercy. Had me screaming and hollering like never before. It was the best sex we've EVER had. And it was only a quickie. Who knew you could have sex in 5 different positions in 8 minutes. Get a nut and have an orgasm. Good GAWD. Shawn Corey Carter is the man. He could never be replaced. My feelings for Tony are now non existent. Who knew. I was tired as hell. After we were finished we stared at each other. We look deep into each other's eyes. It felt we were having a conversation. I attempted to get out of the shower but he grabbed me and tongued me down. I got out of the shower and he stayed in to wash his body. I was definitely less upset but still mad at the same time. It helped but not like I wanted it to. I got dressed. Jayden was in his crib playing with his toys. Jay got out of the shower and got dressed. "We need to talk tonight after Jayden and my mom are asleep" he said. I looked at him and nodded. "Okay". His mom was here an hour later. Whoopdy dooo! Jay went to open the door. My mom came right after his mom. Everyone greeted each other. I had Jayden in lap. It was awkward at first. 


Mama Tina: About Jayden's party. 
Bey: Well I want him to have Elmo and Clifford there.
Mama Gloria: Whats wrong with the clown idea?

(Jay) 
Beyonce, please keep your cool. I just gave you some good ass dick. 


Bey: Nothing is wrong with it. He's afraid of clowns. 
Mama Gloria: *grabs Jayden* My grandson isn't afraid of clowns. You're not afraid of clowns are you JayJay. 


(Mama Tina) 
How the hell is she gonna tell Beyonce what my grand baby isn't afraid of. Chile. The nerve. 


Jay: Ma, Jayden is afraid of clowns.
Mama Gloria: Ohh. Is he? Well, why y'all just didn't tell me?


(Bey)
Bitch, I just did. You know what..


Jayden: *reaches for Bey*
Bey: Now you want mommy? *takes Jayden* 




(Jay) We continued to talk about Jayden's party. There was definitely tension between my Mom and Bey. It was thick. No one snapped until my mom stepped outta bounds..


Mama Gloria: Do you just hold this boy all day? Thats why he's spoiled now. He shouldn't be sucking on a pacifier. Mmm. He is too big for that. 
Jay: Mama-
Bey: *double looks at MG* Excuse me??
Mama Gloria: I'm just saying he's damn near a year old with a pacifier and bottles. Holding him all day long isn't good.
Bey: *stands up* Excuse me but the last time that I checked I was Jayden's mother. I carried him in MY belly for 9 months. I was in labor for 11 hours. Not you. How I choose to me raise MY child is MY decision. Not anyone else's. No one asked you throw him a birthday. Im very capable of doing it my DAMN self-
Jay: Beyonce!!
Bey: *looks at him and rolls her eyes* *walks away* 
Jay: *tries to stop her* 
Bey: *pushes him out of the way* Move. *goes to bedroom* 


(Mama Tina)
Now usually I'd be upset with Beyonce. But hell its about damn time. Shoot. Gloria is annoying at times. I just stood there in shock. Mouth just wide open. Looking buck booty cray cray. Chile. I figured I'd go check on my children. So I went to her bedroom. 

TO BE FUCKING CONTINUED...