Rock Head

Bey: Jay, please stay calm! 

Jay: Nah! Fuck that! 

Matthew: I hope that I didn't miss anything!

Jay: What the fuck are you doing here? Aint no one invite you!

Mama Gloria: Shawn! You better watch that mouth boy. 

Jay: Sorry ma! But if Bey doesn't want him here then he needs to go!

Matthew: Isnt this a family portrait? I'm the father-

Solo: *whispers* According to who?

Angie: *whispers* Oop! You ain't right!

Ty: *whispers* He's Kelly's Daddy!

Kelly: *whispers* Y'all gone stop shading me.

Bey: Who invited him? I-

Mama Tina: He's still your father Beyonce! You should-

Bey: Mama, you invited him? 

Mama Tina: Yes I did. You can't just shut him out. 

Bey: I  shouldn't do anything! Mom, why would you do that? 

Matthew: Because I want to be involved in this. I apologized.

Jay: Bey, let me talk to you in the restroom.

Bey: Alright. 

*Jay holds Bey's lower back as she walks towards the restroom*

(Restroom)

Jay: Bey if you don't wanna do this we don't have to.

Bey: What do you wanna do? 

Jay: I'll do what ever you want to do! I know that's your dad. I can't stand his ass, but I already know that you want him in these pictures. I'll do it for you. 

Bey: I'm still hurt but that's my dad. I don't wanna look at these pictures later on and the baby ask why he wasn't in them.

Jay: You gotta point babe. You gone let me him be in the pictures? 

Bey: Yeah. He's trying I guess.

Jay: Why you always gotta be so damn nice.

Bey: blame these hormones. I can't make up my mind; mad or sad-

Jay: I know but let's get this over with so we can get outta here. I don't wanna have-never mind. Come on.

*They walk out of the restroom*

Mama Tina: Is everything okay Bey?

Bey: Yeahh. I'm fine. Let's get through these pictures. My back is killing me.

Matthew: You gone let be in the pictures?

Bey: *looks at him* Yeah I guess. 

Matthew: *excited* Wow. Thanks.

Photographer: Alright, well Bey, Matt, Ms. Tina. Stand on the side of Bey and hold her stomach. 

*They hold her stomach*

Angie: You might wanna smile BB.

Kelly: Yeahh, frowning like someone stole yo food.

Bey: *quick smile* Happy!

Solo: Oh that was real beautiful. 

Bey: *rolls eyes* I know thanks.

Jay: Bey?

Bey: *looks over at Jay* What? 
Jay: Smile. Look happy. 
Bey: *smiles like she's really happy* 
Ty: Got DAMN! Jay got THAT ass in control.
Angie: *laughs* Mind control!
Solo: Leave my Thu Thu alone. 
Kelly: Girl! Find a new nick name already!!
Bey: HA-HA! Very hilarious. That's why y'all single now.


*They all continue to take pictures. They get the pictures framed ans all that good juicy stuff. It's now October 7th; evening time. Jay is shooting his music video for "Show Me What You Got". While Jay is shooting his video Bey is with Kelly, Angie and Ty. 




Bey: Lets go in that baby store. 
Ty: Why?
Bey:To buy me some clothes...Because I'm pregnant you dumb ass.
Angie: I think what Ty was trying to say was that why go in a baby store when you don't even know what you're having yet.

Ty: Thank you Ang. At least someone has common sense. 
Kelly: Hey. So do I.
Ty: Not if you're best friends with Beyonce. 
Bey: You know what! *giggles* Can we just go in the store? I can still buy diapers, diaper wipes, and plain white onzie's and socks. All that good stuff. 
Angie: Welp. She's gotta point.
Bey: Don't I always?
Ty: Do you really want to answer that question? 


*They walk in the store* 


Bey: Awwww. Look at this to-to.
Angie: Oop. Ratchet City.
Ty: Beyonce fucking Knowles. If you don't put that ugly shit DOWN.
Bey: You guys don't like it?
Angie: Hell NAW! The colors don't even go together.
Kelly: I like it Bey. I think you should get it.
Ty: Of course you would like it. You and Beyonce's fashion sense is beyond me. That's why you have me. Thank God.
Angie: Bey you might wanna go look in the BOYS section. 
Bey: Why?
Angie: Umm. Im guessing because you're having a boy maybe.
Bey: I'm having a girl. Who are you? The pregnancy sex teller. 
Kelly: *laughs* You just sound slow as hell.
Angie: Trust me BB. You're not due until march. You're huge for you to be 4 months. If you were a having a girl you wouldn't be so big.
Ty: And you got your baby sex telling degree from !what college? I think I forgot? Oh you didn't get a degree? Ohhh okay.
Angie: *laughs* You know what Ty. Kiss my ass.
Ty: Eww. Maybe if your ASS found a man, then you could get ya ass kissed. But I aint it. SO NO. 
Kelly: I have to agree with Angie. I think you're having a boy too.
Bey: I reallyyyyyy don't wanna have a boy. 
Angie: Why not?
Bey: I just don't. I wanna be able to see my daughter go to prom, comb her hair, and talk about girly stuff.
Ty: Did she just say comb her hair?
Bey: Yes *giggles*
Ty: But Bey. You can BARELY do your own hair.
Angie: That's what I'm saying. That child will walk around looking like buck weeds little sister. I am not here for it.
Bey: *giggles* Leave me alone. 
Ty: What you gone feed that rock head baby?
Bey: Don't call my baby rock head. 
Ty: Um if that baby had Jay's sized head. ROCK HEAD BABY will the nick name. 
Bey: Leave my OTHER baby alone. You ain't right.
Ty: Like I said what you gone feed that ROCK HEAD BABY. Yo ass can't cook to save your life.
Bey: I was thinking, the milk in these huge ass tiddays I have.
Ty: You are just...I MEAN, when she gets older and can longer suck on your tits. Dumb ass girl.
Bey: Ohhhhhh. I don't know. That's what Jay is for.
Kelly: Oh Lordt. My niece or nephew will starve.
Angie: If I have to you that YOU ARE NOT THE AUNTY one more time..
Kelly: TUH! You're just jealous.
Bey: Anywhoooo. Lets pay for this stuff and go to Target. 
Ty: But why are you saying "lets" as if we're all chipping in. Rich ass. *laughs*

*Bey buys some socks and plan white onzie's. They go to Target and Bey buys diapers, diaper wipes, baby shampoo, baby powder, and blah blah blah. They decide go get something to eat after they leave target. They order and the food comes and they eat.*

Ty: Bey, what you gone do if you have a girl and when she's 19 she brings home a "JayZ"

Angie: Jay is going to jail for murder.

Kelly: I would LOVE to see this. I'd record it.

Ty: Yo ghetto ass is always recording something *laughs*

Bey: Honestly. I don't what I'd do. 

Angie: Like mother like daughter. Shame. She gone be hot and FAST just like her damn mama.

Bey: I was NOT fast.

Ty: Girl! This ain't no interview, there are no cameras. We all know you and Jay were suckin and fuckin back in 1996. Don't even. 

Kelly: I-

Bey: Kelly don't you say shit.

Kelly: I was gone ask you to pass the salt and pepper.

Bey: Oh.

Kelly: Don't worry ya secret is safe with me. *winks*

Bey: Well damn bitch. Not anymore *laughs* 

Angie: *laughs* Clocked that tea!

Ty: *laughs* Kelly, you gotta big ass mouth. Can't tell you SHIT. 

Bey: I will never tell you a secret ever again. *laughs*

Kelly: Sorrryyyyy! *giggles*

Angie: Welp. The truth is out now.

Ty: Spill that fuckin tea. 

Bey: What tea? Y'all know everything there is to know. 

Ty: I wanna know what the fuck that nigga was doing fuckin a minor. Molester.
Angie: *cracks up* Did you just call him a molester? I can't deal with life right now. *laughs*
Bey: Oh shut up *laughs* He is not a molester.
Ty: Well what do you call a grown ass man stickin his dick- never mind. Let me stop.
Kelly: Yes please.
Bey: Kelly hush. Big mouth.
Ty: Imagine when ya child wants a cookie at night. This is what's gone happen. Child gone be about 5 years old right. She gone knock on the door, she suppose to be sleep. Here go Bey *Bey voice* Baby, why aren't you sleeping? Here go Brooklyn *baby voice* Mommy can I have a cookie? Here go Bey *Bey voice* Baby, it's too late to have any sugar. Brooklyn gone start crying like her cry baby ass mama and Jay gone be a softy and shit. Here go Jay *Jay voice* Ahh come on babe let her have a cookie. Here go Bey *bey voice* No Jay, it's too late and she already had like 7 cookies. She should be sleep anyway. Here go Jay *Jay voice* Go head Brook go get you a cookie. Here go Bey *Bey voice* I said no, Jay. Then Jay gone be all smooth and shit and grab Beys hand under the covers and put her hands on his dick and give her the look and be like *Jay voice* Didn't I said she could have a cookie. Go get another cookie Brooklyn. The end. *Angie, Kelly and Bey are crack up*


Bey: Ty, what the hell? *laughs*
Angie: You got the REAL tea Ty. *laughs*

Kelly: He got y'all down packed. *laughs*

Ty: Bey don't try to act to like that's not how shit goes down between y'all. *laughs*

*They eat and talk. They go home but Bey decides to visit Jay at the video shoot. She asks the director where his was; which is in her trailer. She goes to his trailer to find him getting dressed up Bey the stylist.*


Jay: Oh what's up babe. What you doing here? 
Bey: Nothing. I just missed you. Can I hug, a kiss, something?
Jay: *hugs her* My bad. You came to watch daddy work? *chuckles* 
Bey: *sits on the couch* If that's what you're calling yourself these days, then yes. 
Jay: *ignores Bey* *to stylist* You like this one or this one.
Stylist: Ooo this one. It brings out your eyes. *smiles*
Jay: Ohh yeahh. *chuckles* I think so too. I do got some sexy ass eyes. 
Stylist: *winks* Mhmm. You sure do Jay.


(Bey) 
Ohh hell nah. This bitch must want her ass beat. Oh wait, I'm pregnant. I can't fight this hoe. I know she's sees me sitting here on this damn couch. She has one more time to bat her fake ass eye lashes at my man and I'm east side kick her ass. With that busted ass weave. Looking like a damn birds nest. This bitch has ashy elbow. How you gone a stylist looking like a bum in skit row. Ooo, calm down Bey. Wait! hol up. I know Jay is not in his damn boxers. Fuck this shit. It's ass whoppin time. 


Bey: Jay...JAY?
Jay: What's up Bey?
Bey: Can I talk to you in PRIVATE *side eyes the stylist*
Stylist: Oop. I get the hint. 
Bey: *fake smiles* That's not all you gone get *winks at her* *Stylist leaves*
Jay: That was rude Beyonce. *sits next to her*
Bey: You wanna tell why you're standing her in ya damn boxers?
Jay: Because I was getting dressed how else-
Bey: Don't get smart! Did you have sex with her?
Jay: Here you go with this shit again. *stands up*
Bey: *stands up* Yeah Here I go. 
Jay: You stay accusing me for shit I'm not doing.
Bey: That's because you're always doing shit that makes me wonder.
Jay: Wonder? What the fu- Why would I fuck that bald head bitch? If anything I would just let her suck my dick IF I was gone cheat on you. 
Bey: *walks towards the door* You're such an ass. 
Jay: *stops her* That's what I meant.
Bey: You said it didn't you.
Jay: I know but-
Bey: Maybe you should think before you say things. 
Jay: Bey look *looks into her eyes* I'm sorry babe. I'm not cheating on. You gotta trust me. I'm coming home to YOU every night. When do I ever have time to cheat. When I'm always working. You're right, I shouldn't be be stand in my draws. I'm sorry. 

Bey: You promise?
Jay: *kisses her passionately* I promise...But since I'm in my  draws, let me take of yours. 

Bey: Don't you have to go shoot this video? *giggles*

Jay: So. They can wait. *slips hand under dress* *kisses her neck*

Bey: Jay stop. 

Jay: Shut up. *rubs her cooch* *sucks her neck*

Bey: Jay-

Jay: *kisses her* *sits on the couch and put Bey on his lap* 

Bey: I love you babe. 

Jay: I love you more. *takes his "ego" out and puts it in Bey*

Bey: *gasps* MM. SHIT.

Jay: *grabs her waist and thrust slowly* 

Bey: *holds the back of the couch* Ssssss....ooooooo!!!!

Jay: Yeah you like that shit huh ? *moans*

Bey: Yesss baby. I like it baby. I like it a lot. *moans* 

Jay: What's my name? *moans*

Bey: Jaaaaaaaayyyy!!!

Jay: *hard thrust* What?

Bey: Daaaaddddyyyyyy!! hmmmmm. 

Jay: *goes faster* Who is yo daddy?

Bey: *screams* You areeeeee. mmmhmmm oooo fuck Jaaaay.

Jay: You gone stop accusing me of shit *grunts* 

Bey: Yessssssssssssssssssss *screams*

Jay: Shut the fuck up. You too fuckin loud!! *goes even faster* 

Bey: Sloooooow doooooownnn Jaaaaaaay.. ahhhhh ahhhhh.

Jay: *grunts* Shut yo as up! Shit this pussy feel good! 

Bey: That huuuurrrtttsss Jaaayy *moans* mmmm *bites lips* 

Jay: *pulls her hair* You gone stop talkin shit all the time..

Bey: Okaaaaaaayyyy. ooo ooooo oooo *moans*

Jay: *goes HAM* *grunts*

Bey: *screams LOUD* 

Jay: *stops* SHUT. THE. FUCK. UP. Shit. Everybody in Africa can hear you. Bite the fuck pillow.

Bey: Sorryy. *grabs pillow* 

Jay: *go HAM* MMM. Shit yo pussy is wet as fuck.

Bey: *biting the pillow, going CRAZY* 

*5 minutes later, Bey already came.*

Jay: *slowly thrusting* Here I come *cums* Oooooo shiiiiit!

Bey: You messed up my hair.

Jay: Maybe next time you'll shut up like I said. 

Bey: *gets up, stumbles*

Jay: *laughs* Gave that ass a new walk!

Bey: Shut up! That's not funny.

Jay: Nah, just a compliement to this DICK! *laughs* *does MJ beat it up* I did that shit..

Bey: *sighs* Dear Lord, please bless Jay with some dancing skills ASAP.

Jay: How you gone pray after you just had sex? 

Bey: The lord knows that I have needs. He knows my heart.

Jay: You gone burn hell! *chuckles* 

Bey: Burning right next to you. *winks* 

Jay: Alright well, babe. Daddy's got work to do.

Bey: Okay. I'll well get dressed so you can walk me to the car.

Jay: Ight.

*Jay gets dressed, they walk out hand in hand. Bey spots the stylist and mean mugs her. They walk to the car Bey gets, Jay lean in and kiss Bey.*

Bey: What time are you coming home?
Jay: I don't know. I'll call you tho.

Bey: Okay. Come home RIGHT AFTER.

Jay: Yes ma'am *chuckles*

Bey: I'm serious Jay.

Jay: Okay. I gotta get to this shit babe. 

Bey: Okay. I love you Jay. 

Jay: Love you too.

Bey: Give me another kiss.

Jay: Come on Bey. I just gave you a kiss. You holdin me up.

Bey: Just give a kiss already and I'll let you go.

Jay: *kisses her* Ight Bey. I gotta go..See you at home.

*Jay walks off. Bey watches him walk away. Jay shoots day 1 of the video.He makes it home around mid night*

Jay: *goes to the fridge and see's a note on it*

"Dear Shawn Rock Head Ass Carter. You just can't listen. Can you? I told you to come home RIGHT AFTER you were doing shooting. If you think that I'm dumb then you're stupid your damn self. I hope that you enjoyed getting your dick sucked by that bald head hoe of a stylist. I hate you and your life existence. I hope you don't plan on being apart of my child's life, because I won't allow it. 

Sincerely, Your Ex Baby Mama !

TO BE FUCKING CONTINUED!!!






PS. I'm not ending the blog. April Fools Bitches. (cracks up at @TeamCarterFan)

Sorry for the typo :/.